Monday, February 21, 2011

To Blog...

A blog, an online journal, a diary, a place to let our conscious and sometimes our subconscious minds flow out onto a computer screen.  Some people are really precise and write with purpose about a specific topic and some people just flow along with the stream of their consciousness.  I think I am somewhere in between the two...  Here we write about whats bothering us, whats going on in our lives, our dreams, our nightmares, our fantasies and our fears.  Some write about one specific part of their life and some write about anything and everything.  Again I hope to be someone that coves a lot of those topics.

So on with the show...What to write about in my first blog...my new job? my dog? the type of man i think i am?  my family? the love of my life?  All good topics and all will make for good entries into this blog but I think I will start with my new job...

Starting tomorrow I will be throwing my hat into the business arena.  I have tried my luck at the education field and found it wasn't the place for me to be so I'm taking this new step in my life and I hope it works out.  Marketing, I get the concept of it, I just hope that I have a knack for it.  The lady that is my boss seems to think I'll be able to do it well and she is being very accommodating with my schedule so all I can do is go in their and give it my best and hope that it all works out for the best. 

More than anything I just want to settle into a career as opposed to having a job.  I want something that I can be proud of and that I can provide for myself and my family.  For too long I have allowed others to provide for me and because of my own pride I refused to go out and get a job that I thought was below me.  I thought I deserved a certain type of job and I wasn't willing to settle for anything but that.  And it has paid off in that I finally do have a job with a successful company and I am really looking forward to the opportunity to prove myself in this field.  I also look at the last couple years of my life and how heavily I have relied on other people to carry part if not all of my burden and that mostly fell and continues to fall directly on the shoulders of my mother. 

What an amazing woman she is, and she understood the effect of sending in application after application and resume after resume was having on me and she would gently massage my ego and let me know it was OK and to just hang in there and it would all work out when she really should have been saying "Go flip burgers at McDonald's" or "Go be a cashier at Stop and Shop"  and every time she wanted to say that she would, but it'd be more of a suggestion "Hey did you ever think about getting a job at Stop & Shop while you're sending out resumes?"  I should have but I was too embarrassed to do that.  My foolish pride; when working for a living, doing whatever you can to make an honest dollar is not something to be embarrassed about. 

So tomorrow starts a new chapter in my life...Hopefully its the start of a long chapter in my life, I didn't like it in the education field and I can't make a living on the playing field, but maybe the business marketing field is where I finally find my niche in the working world.